The Poison Tour Diary via Metal Sludge
 July 31, 2001 / 261 reads / No comments yet


"Mary at the Merry Go Round"

What a week! Leon from Lynard Skynard found dead. Robbin Crosby's story appearing on KNAC.com. Let me say something, before anyone judges Robbin on any level, realize that this guy is one of the kindest, stand up people I have ever met. I am one of the fuckheads that haven't helped him out. No excuses, I suck! Ratt gave us our first tour and if it wasn't for them, we may have never gotten to a second single and that single was "Talk Dirty To Me" that put us in the limelight. Robbin, I love ya and I do mean it. Please forgive me for not paying attention. I suck a big fuckin' dick for not. Poison and I want you alive and so does the world. You are rock and roll royalty.
Robbin would pay us nightly visits before we were to go on. We were his boys and he was a big cheerleader for Poison. He wanted the best for us. No jealousy, just give the fans more rock and roll and keel over doing it if ya have to. Every night on the Ratt tour, we would hear Robbin in that loud assed voice, "Paaaarrrty!" and whatever mood you were in, it would turn to a great one. You just knew it was time to rock. People, this is a guy with a bigger heart than a Cadillac. A class act and an angel without wings. Robbin I salute you in your struggle. The party ain't even over bro. You can handle anything. I pale in your shadow.
Well, I finally met Helena Handbasket. The Sludgette of the month. Very cute indeed. She is quite nice as well. She is either high maintenance or just simply not interested in me. Whichever, I found her to be pleasant but somewhat detached. She seemed nervous saying that it was all the caffeine that she had earlier. I hope you had a good time sweetie. I did my best.

The Set-Up...

As this tour escalates through the Midwest and onto the West Coast, I realize that there is more to a tour than a hotel, the occasional mall, a stage and a backstage. There's catering! No, really, when you tour consistently throughout your career, you see people grow up, fall out and become something else. You sometimes bond for life and sometimes only for seconds. It's all a part of me now and I shall keep it for life. The good, the bad, the ugly and the stiffeling. It's all here and it's more about one's perception than reality. But, what is reality? Is it me at home in my studio looking for that lost sound and petting my one of many dogs? Or, is it my trips backstage to meet the press and fans. Is it my youth, full of hope and visions of being a rock star? It's everything, I suppose. It's all reality and reality isn't everything it's cracked up to be. So, once in a while, I tie one on. Don't get me wrong, I love my life, but anyone of you I welcome to try it on for a day. Oh, yeah, that's right, that's what this diary is supposed to do. As I open my first beer of the night, Paige climbs on my lap, I take a sip and think back...

The Story...

My first kiss was from a girl with flowers in her hair in a Chevy van at an outdoor concert when I was 10 years old. My sister, a bonified hippie at the time, had gone off to find a bathroom while a group of Flower Children who were fond of my unusually long hair for a preteen, offered to watch me. I didn't understand sex and I don't think the girl was trying to turn me on. However, I got what I would later refer to as a "warm spell". I didn't understand it, but I kind of liked it. As I grew up, I would go to concerts and see countless older girls dressed in various ways vying for the attention of guys that either were in rock bands or looked like they should be.
There was a girl at a Johnny Winter concert once, I was about 14 by then and about then I thought I understand sex just a little. Well, a little more than I did at 10, anyway. She had on landlubber jeans that were hip huggers, a glittery top with tits that looked like they could poke your eyes out and these silver sparkle platform shoes. Her nails were painted silver and her toenails to match. Her hair was cut like David Bowie circa Ziggy Stardust but alot longer and she had deep brown eyes highlighted with the most perfect make-up I had ever seen. A silver star graced her cheekbone. The glitter era was in full swing in England and if you were hip, you looked like that here in the U.S.A. "I've seen you before." She says to me as I dodge a frisbee. "You come in the Merry Go-Round at the mall, don't you?" Her lips looked like they could swallow me and in my dreams for the rest of my days, they did.. every night. "You're really cute, too bad you are so young. One day, sweetie" She walks off with a backstage pass. Good Lord, what happens back there? I wondered. I had only seen the pictures in Creem Magazine. Rock Stars sharing drinks with these kinds of girls. Where did these girls come from? I want one. A younger version just for me.
"Send me somebody" comes blasting out the stereo as Steven Tyler cries to the Lord above...."You can send me a floozie, send me anybody please..." My door was locked, the stereo was too loud and I was having my daily jerk fest thinking about her, again. An hour later I'm at the mall. I pass by Merry Go Round. There she is. Jeans too tight with a Rolling Stones tongue patch sewn in the crotch, a halter top with red and black glitter stripes and those lips that have had me on pins and needles for weeks. "Hey there cutie". She smiles and then looks over at another girl who looks very tired but is busy folding shirts and putting them on a rack. The tired coworker looks up for sec and then goes back to what she is doing. The coworker is cute too, but pales compared to... "Mary. My name is Mary". She announces in a peppy voice. "I'm Rikki" (at that time it was Ricky). "Where did I see you at, Ricky?" "The concert. Johnny Winter." Oh, yeah." She says. "Boring backstage that night. I guess Johnny wasn't feeling too well. I miss Rick Derringer being in that band. He still calls my friend Shirley, though." Really?" I answer. "Oh, yeah, they all love me and Shirley. Wanna see my pictures?" "Sure", I say.
As I page through Mary's scrapbook, I see pictures of her with rock stars. My idols, mind you. "Here's me and Dennis Dunaway from Alice Cooper. He's such a sweetie!" She comments. Here's me and Joey Kramer from Aerosmith. Everyone likes Steven, but Joey is the real cutie in that band, believe me!" She goes on. "Is he cool?" I ask. "The fuckin' coolest, Ricky." "I wanna be in your book?" I say. "Sure. Next time I have my camera. O.K.?" Yeah, O.K. "You in a band? She asks. You look like you should be with that cute hair and all." "Umm, well, kinda. We're just getting started. Ya know Mary, one day I want to have a girl just like you." "Don't worry Ricky." Mary gets closer to me and those lips are about two inches from mine. She goes on, One day you'll be a big rock star and you will have as many as you want. Just remember us little folks, O.K. sweetie?" "Don't worry, I won't ever forget you Mary." I say back to her. "Yeah, well we'll see about that Ricky..."

Back to the other night...

Paige climbs off of my lap. Somone keeps knocking on the dressing room door and Paige is obviously annoyed. So am I. "What do ya need!" I say very loud, annoyed voice. "Sorry, I didn't know anyone was in there still." Comes a muffled voice. I hear it trail off as the person in question obviously walks away. "What were you thinking about just now?" Paige asks me. Her glitter top shining occasionally when the bathroom light catches it just right. "Oh, nothing really. Just thinking you are really pretty, that's all." I exclaim. "Thank you. But I bet ya tell all the girls that, huh?" "Nope, just the pretty ones." I retort."So, what ya wanna do?" She asks in a soft, sexy voice. Her lips, just the way Mary's looked when I was 14, form the words."Actually, I wanna know what you want to do?" I say. "No, I asked you. Whatever you want" "O.K., wanna take your clothes off and go down on me?" I reply. "Whatever you want. I told you. Just don't put me in your diary. Well, at least don't use my real name if you do. O.K.?" "Fine, no problem." I agree.

Mary, come to my rescue...

Kiss was coming to the Forum in Harrisburg. I really wanted to meet that band. There is only one person that could arrange that. I bum a ride to the mall and after a quick stop at the pretzel stand, I walk into the Merry Go Round with an extra pretzel for Mary. I hope she likes mustard, I was thinking. "Can I help you find something." An older woman asks me in a nonchalant tone."Yeah, is Mary here?" "Nope", replies the woman."She took off too many days and was coming in here hung over." She's obviously very annoyed and doesn't care what she is saying to me. "We have a new manager, he fired her yesterday. It's a better run store now." We'll, where'd she go?" I ask in a obvious stutter."Out with Foghat in Maryland." Some blonde haired guy who looks more gay than glam slices the words toward me like they were razors that Mary should be at the butt end of."Are you her brother?" "No. I'm just a friend." I say. "Oh. I see." The queer goes back to his work with a smirk that I didn't understand and didn't want to. I walk out in to oncoming people traffic in a daze.
How could anyone fire Mary? I was thinking. She was this store. She was this mall. She was, everything quite honestly. She was the only thing rock n roll that this small suburban town had. See, she was too good for this fuckin' town. I began to assemble the full picture in my brain. Mary was my star and I bet there wasn't another soul who felt like this about her. I walk in the record store a few doors down. The cover of the New York Dolls, "Too much, too soon." stares at me as I wonder around. I know that face. I saw that guy in one of Mary's pictures. As I continue to gaze at David Johansen on the cover in all his glitter glory. I walk toward the check out counter with it. "Good choice, some long haired guy with a long scarf says to me from behind the counter. "This is a great record!"

Back to the other night, again...

"I guess you have other girls you want to see before you have to go, huh?" Paige says as she wipes my cum from her lips. The last few moments were somewhat blissful. "Uh, no, not really." I answer as I pull my pants up and start searching for my shirt."I doubt you'll call me, but here's my number anyway." Paige hands me a folded up piece of paper. "Why would you say that?" I ask. "Ahh, I know how you guys are. I used to have a crush on this guy in a band. It was back when I was working at a clothing store. He came in to see me all the time. We finally got it on and then I never heard from him again." "That sucks!" I say in a pissy tone."Whatever." Paige says and walks out the dressing room door. I follow her for a few steps. I give her one last kiss and I walk out toward the bus past a few girls still hanging around. I see this guy standing on the other side of a chain link fence."Hey, Rikki! "You're show fuckin' rocked tonight! The guy is about 15 with an Aerosmith shirt on, a poison bandana and shoulder length hair. "That girl you were just kissing. She is beautiful, man! I want a girl like that one day. "I pause for a second. Then I pull my Poison laminate off of my neck and toss it over the fence to the guy. "Here man, they'll all pay attention to you now." I say. "Holy fuck, dude. Thanks!" I get on the bus, quickly drink a beer and smoke the days last cigarette then go straight to my bunk. For the first time, thoughts of Mary don't put me to sleep this night.

--Rikki

"When I say I'm in love, you best believe I'm in Love. L.U.V."

- New York Dolls

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